I’d like to submit a topic for your discussion and debate. As many of you know, California recently mandated state-wide douchebaggery. At the same time, I’ve been seeing tons of dudes rocking the girls’ sunglasses upside down on the back of their heads look. And it begs the question: which accessory is the douchiest of them all?

The Bluetooth earpiece when not in a car?

The sunglasses on rear of cranium?

Or, the old standby, the sunglasses on indoors when not participating in the World Series of Poker?

The ‘Tooth-in-ear just screams “I’m important! No, really!” Which is funny, because 10 years ago, we all thought that kinda star trek shit would be geeky, but it’s actually far more prevalent amongst ‘bags. On the other hand, the backwards sunglasses are just begging for anybody to notice your $200 shades, even though it’s 11:30 pm. But the indoor sunglasses tell the world that you’re willing to sacrifice visual fidelity in order to put glass between you and everyone else.

I don’t know, it’s a tough call. Right now I’m leaning towards the backwards sunglasses, if only because I keep seeing bros roll up at like 3:30 am with this look. It’s like, dude, there’s no way you couldn’t have found the opportunity to take off your shades in the last 7 hours since daylight faded. Surely you could have left them in the giant penis metaphor truck that you drive.

But what do my fellow members of the Counterforce think?

Also, dead money kids: you never see Negreanu or Ivey wearing shades at the table. I’m just sayin’.