Craigslist is the almanac of the modern human condition. It reflects everything we want (sex, an apartment, already assembled IKEA furniture, that the person who makes our coffee every morning secretly is in love with us) and makes it look like it is actually within our reach. Just click and email that anonymous Craigslist address, and you have a chance to have it. What is happening on Craigslist? What are people looking for right this second?
A missed connection at a sex club called Blowbuddies in San Francisco:
It occurred to me after we said our goodbyes that we should have exchanged numbers so that we could get together some time and really get comfortable. If you find this lets make some plans.
all we have to do now is take these lies and make them true somehow.
A fellow in Philadelphia would like a massage before the eagles game, but not to worry, he doesn’t have a “discusting hairy body”. He’d also like to offer you a drink in exchange for the massage.
Date: 2008-09-21, 8:07AM EDT
26- 6’3 athletic and not one of those discusting hairy bodys to worry about
i played in an easter seals charity softball event all day yesterday and i woke up today stiff as a board.
legs and bag are just cramped up
i am a licenced and certified auto mechanic or if theres something else you need maybe we can work a deal
if not maybe cash coupld be thrown in there
let me know asap this needs to be done before 3 so i can get to the bar for the eagles game
hell maybe i can even pay for you at the bar for the game if you want that as a trade
this dude probably talks on this phone.
On “Jersey Shore” Craigslist, there appears to be some discussion a woman named Sue. Here is a small tidbit:
Date: 2008-09-21, 12:59PM EDT
You must be mistaken. Sue is the one at Captains Inn everyone dumps a load in
Although apparently, she also goes by Sharon. The Captain’s Inn is a restaurant on the Jersey Shore, they have a tiki bar.
this is what you get when you google image sue & captain's inn. i don't think this is her.
If you’re looking to move to Alaska, you can get a job as a waitress at the Eureka Lodge and “come join the family. Satellite TV is offered! For 225 hugs, you can hang out with a Cassandra in New York City, who “who wants to take a walk on the wild side and get in touch with the crazy days of youth.” A homeowner in Sacramento seeks a slim, slender transsexual for a long term relationship. He enjoys various physical activities. If you’re in the Austin, Texas area and looking to buy an old P.O.S truck, please ask for David.
If you’re in Fargo, North Dakota, perhaps you’ve seen this person’s dead mom’s wedding ring. While you’re there, this bi hottie is back in school and on the prowl. But please, no femenine guys. In Las Vegas, a man is offering rent in his home on a reduced scale, but only if you are a “spinner“. Tattoos a plus, ladies. And you can even bring a friend! Also, if you’re a nudist, or just don’t mind being naked in a house with a guy, you can live here for free.
Your Craigslist reading list:
1. 24 Hours on Craigslist, this movie was so popular in San Francisco it ran at the (totally awesome) Red Vic Movie house like 20 times and every single time the line went to the corner.
2. Why Women Hate Men, a collection of the worst in M4W Craigslist ads
3. Sleeping Around Craigslist, two old broads decide to slut it up on Craigslist and write an article about it
4. Want it from behind while you play Mario Brothers?
Your Craigslist mixtape:
1. Mariah Carey, “Touch My Body“
3. George Michael, “Freedom“
seymour fuzzypants, the best boy i ever met on craigslist.
Ahhh, the joys of Craigslist, where people can be people.
“none of that disgusting body hair…”
Jeez, everything people told me about manliness when I was a child was a lie. I think pretty soon we’re going to enter a cultural epoch where smaller penis size is considered more desirable.
I once gave this girl a ride from SF to LA. She was telling me about how she was on that 24 hours on craigslist movie. I guess in the movie she was the girl trying to start a band. Anyhoo, the point is, after I gave her a ride, she started this band, Built for Sea, that I kinda like and is somewhat popular in the bay.